"Leaves seen through my window pane, remind me that it's time to change my life again"

November of 2009 we found out my dad was dying from psoriasis of the liver. In December we had his funeral and two days later found out my mom had AML Leukemia. She spent Christmas, New Years, her 50th birthday, and my sister's 17th birthday in the hospital. She was out in time for my 21st birthday and for the past year she's been in remission. Yesterday we found out it's back. This time she will be going for one high dose of chemo and then to Emory for a bone marrow transplant. 
    
          In a way the past year has made me grow up a lot. I didn't have a whole lot of choice but I managed to keep myself sane while taking care of my sister, grandma, myself, and taking care of my mom. My sister decided to run from things and withdrew from family. She got in some trouble and made my mom worry twice the normal amount. This time sister will be living with me and my fiance again while mom is gone and we've agreed to some rules. HOPEFULLY this will work out. I've tried to explain to her how important it is that she's there for all of us and that even when she's out running away from her problems... they're still here waiting on her. It's time to face things head on! It's also made me realize what's important and what's trivial. I've withdrawn from some of my friends because even though they know what I'm going through they still complain about the little stuff and it makes me angry.  Angry might not be the best word. It just bothers me that some of my friends complain about every little things. For instance; I have a friend who bitches about every little thing, nothing is ever good enough and every time we talk it's about HER drama. She's known for three weeks what's going on with my mom and has not once asked me how I'm doing or how my mom is doing. She's had plenty of time to complain about her dog, boyfriend, brother, my ex, his new girlfriend, etc. but hadn't once considered my feelings. She text me the other day complaining that she had a flat tire and our neighbor told her he would change it AFTER it stopped raining. She didn't have to be at work or anything, she just wanted her tire changed right then and there regardless of the heavy rain. She expected him to get outside in the rain and do it for her and was mad when he didn't want to do it right then. (This is our neighbor, not her boyfriend) By the tenth text about how sucky everyone is I got tired of listening to her complain and simple told her that if a flat tire was the worst thing that happened to her that day then she was doing alright.

Okay, enough ranting. I shouldn't expect people to change or feel the same way I do about things but I do wish people wouldn't take things for granted and would actually slow down and thing about what's really important and what's not. Everything happens for a reason, even if you can't see the reason right away.

Fanny packs.

Okay, I get that bellbottoms are back. I probably won't be wearing them this year but I don't hate the look, totally. I love that lace is still in and that crop tops are making a big come back. What I don't get are the fanny packs that everyone is now calling the "belt purse". It's not a belt purse, it's a fanny pack and it still looks ridiculous. 

Belt Purse: Link

True, they're a lot nicer than what I remember wearing as a kid. They might as well be neon pink, either way I'll stick to my fossil satchels. This is one trend that should have been left alone. 

Book review and neighbor review.

Pretty Little Devils: Nancy Holder

I personally thought this book was a little like the pretty little liars series mixed with a little gossip girl. I bought the book from Books a Million, yesterday, for $1. I started reading it and could not put it down until I knew who the murderer was. It started off much like any "mean girls" based book but quickly turned into a murder mystery. I like that I don't have to read 18 books to find out who the murderer was but it ended lazily. Of course, the ending was a big twist but it seemed like Nancy Holder just gave up the last chapter and got it over with as soon as she could. All in all it was a good book for a rainy Sunday and it kept my attention. In fact I was a little irritated when we had company pop up at the house and I had to stop reading. The Splash Proof Cover made it a good book for laying the in the bathtub and relaxing...which was cut short when my friend came in. 

Speaking of how company cut my book reading short for a few hours... If you live by your friend then it's probably best to sit down and talk about space. I should've done so months ago. My friend thinks because we are neighbors and friends that she no longer has to knock before coming inside, doesn't have to give me a heads up when she comes over, and a lot of times tries to get into the house even if we're gone. I love her to death but I also love my alone time or my fiance time. I don't want to get out of the bathtub when you come over but I also don't want you to sit in the bathroom with me talking the whole time i'm trying to relax. DRIVES ME NUTS! 

things that say stupid

Somethings that I find quite ridiculous:

Shoes that have frogs on them and are made for people over the age of two.

Shoes that make your feet look like horse hoofs...why?!

Jewelry that looks like your retainer. I never wore a retainer but why commemorate childhood pain by making it into a necklace? 

Stuff like this. It could have been a pretty cool hoodie had she not left one side really long and the other really short. (I love this website, www.regretsy.com) 

Alright, that's it for ridiculous things I found on the Internet this morning. If I run across anything really neat or really stupid I'll post it up!  

Guess I have to start at the beginning

I am currently working two jobs (full time marketing, part time hostess/server). I've always liked to sew and make stuff so I figured I'd dedicate this blog to a little bit of fashion and a little bit of my life. I'm currently obsessed with crop tops, flowy tops, lace, and anything that could be related to hippies or summer. I've been doing research on what's "in" this spring/summer and here is what i've learned:

 "IN"/"OUT"
Denim trousers instead of jeggings - This is a good thing because I haven't even wanted to do the jegging trend...call me unfashionable but you either wear jeans or leggings, not a combination of the two. You can't cheat at life like that!

Bell bottom jeans instead of skinny jeans - I'm a little sad to hear that bell bottoms are making a come back. They look awesome on all the models but in real life they look horrible on 80% of the world. I refuse to wear anything other than bootcut or skinny jeans. I'm starting to think i'm not as fashionable as I think. 


I've also noticed that nude is a big hit this year for fingernails and shoes. I like the color on both. I'm more likely to wear the nude trend on my feet though. I like my bright pink toe nails and sparkly pink nails. I noticed that those awful "jelly" shoes are back, I thought those were a failure and didn't expect to see them back again for anyone over the age of five. Those shoes always gave me blisters and to stop the blisters my mom would make me wear socks which just made the whole ordeal that much worse. 




IMPORTANT: I've been looking everywhere for a pair of lightweight linen pants...white or khaki... and can not find them anywhere! Two years ago they were everywhere and I had two different pairs of each but I can't find mine and I'm determined to find another pair to make me happy. Any news will help.