just a memory.

"You know, I don't NEED you. I want you." I looked at him through glassy eyes as he laid beside me monitoring my breathing. Even now, eight years later, I don't know why I felt the need to punish him even more for my mistakes. Maybe a part of me knew that I wasn't going to slip into a coma. Maybe part of me knew, even then, that I wasn't getting away from it all that easy. I'm not sure if I wanted him to just go away or if I was testing him to see if he even could but he didn't. He stayed right beside me all night, watching me breathe as I watched the back of my eyelids. He wore a hurt expression and I could tell he wanted to say the things that were plaguing his mind but once again I had adverted the topic with my own selfishness.